This Week’s Top Team: What a week. I went straight Rambo-style racking it up (130) fantasy points on the afternoon.
QB: Rex Grossman: Minus 8 points… My good lord. I can’t believe my quarterback had negative points, freaking 8 of them, and I still scored 130. Amazing.
RB: Clinton Portis: Clinton’s 58 yards rushing weren’t as many as I figured, but his 2 scores, and 17 yards receiving added to the yards slammed me 18 fantasy points on the afternoon.
RB: LaDainian Tomlinson: Mr. (L) T – In all his glory, not only brought me loads of points, but an absolutely brilliant victory in my fantasy league. Championships are built on stuff like this. LT smashed around for 4 touchdowns against the 49ers. With 71 rushing and 64 receiving, plus those 4 scores, LT snaked me 37 big fantasy smackers.
WR: Terrell Owens: Only to be outdone by LT in the touchdown book of Week 6, TO snagged 3 touchdowns. Total, he caught 4 balls for 45 yards, but those touchdowns bring in the fantasy points. 22 points for me.
WR: Laveranues Coles: Master Vernes also came to play on Sunday, tallying 105 yards on 5 catches. Did I mention the 2 touchdowns? Ah yes, 2 scores, and one was 58 yards, which gives me a two point bonus. 22 + 2 = 24 fantasy big ones.
TE: Antonio Gates: Mr. Gates is finally coming to play. With another score today, and 78 yards from the TE spot, Gates brought me home 13 fantasy points.
K: Jeff Wilkins: The Hawks allowed nothing but scores, and for the first time, a low scoring game out of my Fantasy Hero brought me tumbling down in my Dynast league. The 4 points here didn’t help either.
D: Broncos: Allowing only 3 points and 244 total yards, with an interception a fumble recovery and 4 sacks, those pesky Broncos rolled in a grand total of 20 fantasy points. Making them the 4th Sunday position with 20 points or more. Yeehaw!
LUCKY’S Week 2 SLEEPERS
Joey Harrington: So, as a stop gap, you have to admit, I was right about Joey. He had 2 picks, but, His 266 yards passing and one touchdown in the air looked a lot better than Andrew Walter’s stats. 12 fantasy points – Gotta get a “B”.
Tatum Bell: Finally, as I predicted, Mr. Bell had a touchdown on Sunday Night, his first of the season. With 83 yards on the ground, and 11 receiving yards, Mr. Bell totaled me 15 fantasy points. I’ll take another “B”.
Julius Jones: Julius had the better yardage total, but the fact that he didn’t score made him a worse play than his backup, Marion Barber. That being said, I still had 10 points from the guy. I’ll take a “C”.
Michael Turner: Flunk me here. All the rushes went to LaDainian, as Turner didn’t see much time on the field. I took an “F”!!!
Lee Evans: Evans had a decent game. 8 receptions for 82 yards got me 8 fantasy points. However, the Bills lost to the freaking Lions, giving me a big fat loss on my bet sheet. “C”.
Jericho Cotchery: 6 damn yards? Damn it all to hell! “F”!!!
Jeremy Stevens: Fantasy Points? What are those? Stevens has no idea. I get an “F”!
Redskins DST: I don’t even care how many points the Skins scored, I’m not even going to check, what I do know is they lost to the Titans. What does that mean? I get another F!!!
LUCKY’S Week 1 WUSSIES
Jake Delhomme: Jakey was no wussy against the Ravens. Baltimore got their 2nd straight loss, and Jakey went for 365 yards and 2 scores. Take away 4 point for two picks, and Jake hit up the 18 point mark in Week 6.
Larry Johnson: Would you say LJ struggled? He scored once, but 26 yards rushing and 6 yards receiving aren’t Larry numbers. 8 fantasy points from a number 1 pick is wussy-royal!
Santana Moss: Moss only had 50 yards receiving, but his 33 rushing yards pushed him out of Wussy status right into the mediocre “I wouldn’t chose to start him but if I did, he didn’t lose me the game” label.
Rudi Johnson: 52 yards on 17 carries, no scores, no receiving yards. The “Toughest guy in the league” had a fantasy wussy day. 2 out of 4 ain’t bad! I’d be a millinaire on the baseball diamond!