Tag Archives: Heath Miller

Week 5 Waiver Watch: Thing 1 and Thing 2

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I am a dog person. I love the way they are happy to see you when you get home despite the fact that you left them alone all day. I love that they go from sleeping lazily on the couch to hyper-play mode in 1.3 seconds at the site of a ball. I love that they always seem to occupy a much larger portion of the bed when you wake up in the morning than they did when you fell asleep last night. I love dogs because of their unyielding loyalty and need to carve out a role in the pack that is your family.  In short, I love dogs because of their strong sense of self: they know what they are, and they know what they aren’t.

However, this general rule does have it’s exceptions.  On some occasions I will take my dog (3-year-old Australian Shepherd) to the “dog park”.  For those of you that are cat people (communists), this is a gathering place for K9s and owners alike.  It is basically a cluster-bomb of crazy dogs, prissy dogs, horny dogs, playful dogs and mean dogs.  It’s a lot like college in that way.  The exception to my dog loving rule comes in the form of the prissy dog.  These overgrown rats with the bulging eyes, twig-like legs and quivering disposition seem to have problems identifying their natural place in the pecking order.  These are the animals which nature is trying it’s best to “select” for removal from the face of the Earth but we humans, we love our genetic mutants.

On several occasions one of these yappers has managed to free themselves from their Frankensteinian owners and has run up to my pup in what can only be described as an attempt to pick a fight.  They will bark at her, growl at her and even try nipping at her in what is a clear fit of envious genetic rage.  Me being a scientific observer, I generally let the drama play out to it’s predictable conclusion before intervening.  Typically my pup will entertain their vocal protests but when that first attempted nip takes place she will take the instigating creature between her jaws and either pin them firmly to the ground or rag-doll them like her favorite chew toy.  She never hurts more than their pride but I can’t help but thinking as I look down at the pint-sized pooch now lathered in my dog’s drool, “what the hell did you think was going to happen?”

That’s why when I heard that NFL wide receiver Braylon Edwards had thrown a punch at LeBron James’ 130-pound buddy outside of a Cleveland night club, my reaction was quite similar … “what the hell did you think was going to happen?”  I have crossed paths with enough prissy dogs and 130-pound yappers in my time to know exactly where Edwards was coming from when he decided enough was enough.  The fact that the featherweight filed a complaint which now looks like it was a false accusation lends further support to my yap-dog theory.  Whatever the case, I applaud Braylon for his willingness to let nature take it’s course and congratulate him on his recent escape from the fantasy hell that is Cleveland, Ohio.  I give you my week 5 waiver tips … because we are all Witnesses.

Thing 1: This WR has totalled 11 catches for 214 yards and 1 TD so far in 2009.  He has disappointed early in the year and now may miss a game or two with an injury.  He is currently owned in 100% of ESPN leagues.

Thing 2: This WR has totalled 17 catches for 271 yards and 0 TDs so far in 2009.  He has come on strong and may be the new favorite target for his respective team.  He is currently owned in 9% of ESPN leagues.

Reality Check: Thing 1 is Roy Williams and Thing 2 is Kenny Britt.  I gave Britt’s teammate Justin Gage some love in an earlier column but the rookie out of Rutgers may have overtaken his fellow wideout for targets.  At 6’3″ and 218 lbs. Britt has the ideal frame of a red zone target despite his lack of scores so far this season.  Nate Washington will make the occasional big play and Gage is still in the mix, but going forward I like Britt a lot if you are looking for consistent weekly production with considerable upside as well.

Thing 1: This TE is off to a slow start this season but has still caught 23 passes for 212 yards and 1 TD.  He is one of the most reliable receiving targets on his team and is currently owned in 100% of ESPN leagues

Thing 2: This TE is off to a nice start this season and has caught 24 passes for 181 yards and 2 TDs.  He is also one of the most reliable receiving targets on his team but is owned in just 18% of ESPN leagues.

Reality Check: Thing 1 is Jason Witten and Thing 2 is Heath Miller.  Miller probably won’t be near Witten in terms of yardage or receptions at season’s end, but he is one of Ben Roethlisberger’s favorite red zone targets and he may be able to haul in 7-8 TDs before all is said and done.  Miller has some of the softest hands in the league and his ability to block means he stays on the field for the majority of Pittsburgh’s plays.  I like for him to finish as a top-10 fantasy TE and he can be had in many leagues for the price of a waiver claim.

Thing 1:  This QB has completed 59.6% of his passes for a bad team.  His sample size is still relatively small but for the most part you know what you are getting here.  He is owned in 83% of ESPN leagues.

Thing 2:  This QB has completed 53.1% of his passes for a bad team.  He recently took over the reigns of this offense and the jury is still out on him.  He is owned in 1% of ESPN leagues.

Reality Check:  Thing 1 is Matt Cassel and Thing 2 is Josh Johnson.  Hear me out on this one.  Presumably you are not starting either of these guys on a regular basis but I am intrigued by Johnson’s upside and in my opinion he has better playmakers around him on offense.  In addition to being a very intelligent passer (among the highest ratings in the country while at USD), Johnson has tremendous athletic ability and can make plays with his legs when the pocket breaks down.  Top pick Josh Freeman is not ready so Johnson will get some leash to play with and has some nice matchups coming up if you are in need of a bye week fill-in.

Thing 1:  This RB has totalled 198 total yards and 1 TD on 54 touches (3.7 ypt).  He is banged up and could miss several weeks before returning to action.  Currently he is owned in 99% of ESPN leagues.

Thing 2: This RB has totalled 249 yards and 2 TDs on 39 touches (6.4 ypt).  He has taken the lead role while his injury-prone backfield mate is nursing an injury.  Currently he is owned in 37% of ESPN leagues.

Reality Check: Thing 1 is Darren McFadden and Thing 2 is Rashard Mendenhall.  Boy does it look like I was wrong on Mendenhall.  Most of his production in the NFL has come in one shining week but for the first time I saw the strong running and determination to hit the hole that made him a #1 pick out of Illinois.  I doubt he will sustain this level of production (especially when Willie Parker returns to share the load), but tasty matchups against the Lions and Browns in the next two weeks mean that Mendenhall should not be available in leagues of any size.  Go get him and enjoy the ride.

theRUNDOWN Review: Week 2

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Couldn’t even break 100… Got crushed by a couple guys and finished with 95 points. This was the damage!

QB: Peyton Manning vs. Minnesota: 311 yards, sure, but his 1 touchdown and 2 picks didn’t help me much. Peyton was only good for 14 fantasy points.

RB: LaDainian Tomlinson vs. Denver: 10 carries for 26 yards, 2 catches for 12? Oh no you didn’t LT. This point total bruises my soul, 5 fantasy points for the king. His toe injury hurt him, but his stat line killed me.

RB: Adrian Peterson vs. Indianapolis: Without scoring a touchdown, Peterson still finished tied for 4th amongst running backs with 22 fantasy points – he now leads the league in rushing yards.

WR: Randy Moss vs. Jets: 2 catches for 22 yards. Dang it! I was brutal a couple times this week.

WR: Reggie Wayne vs. Minnesota: 20 fantasy points, good for 10th amongst receivers.

TE: Heath Miller vs. Cleveland: 5 fantasy points – should have taken Scheffler (24 fantasy points) should have done a lot in all these years, this wasn’t my worst decision.

K: Rod Bironas vs. Cincinnati: 6 points- 1 field goal, 3 extra points – actually a good day for my kickers – still, not great considering all the options (30).

D: Giants vs. St. Louis: 19 fantasy points, good for 3rd amongst defenses – solid pick. That’s what 6 sacks and 1 interception return for a touchdown will do for ya.

PAPA’S Week 1 SLEEPERS

JaMarcus Russell: “220+ and 2 scores… Doubt me? We’ll see who is right.” Oh dang it! My foot tastes so bad after walking around bare-foot all weekend. 2 freaking fantasy points – doubters, you got me on this one! F

Aaron Rodgers: 4th amongst quarterbacks after throwing 3 touchdown passes against the Lions. He now has accounted for 5 touchdowns and zero turnovers in two games. A+

Chris Johnson: Gathered over 100 yards this week, 2 catches for 12 yards as well. He’s legit. B

Julius Jones: 4th overall running back in Week 2 – A+ for me on that one.

Laurence Maroney: Maroney looked off before an injury took him out of the game. Maybe I’m just wrong about this kid? F

Antwaan Randel El: 4 catches for 53 yards, looks like Jason Campbell figured out who to give more looks to last week (see Santana Moss’s totals in your fantasy league). D+

Anthony Gonzalez: Great day for Gonzo – those that played him reaped the benefits – 22 fantasy points good for 7th amongst wide receivers… Has he taken over Marvin’s spot as the #2? A+

Robert Meachem: He only had 1 catch for 19 yards, but that one was a touchdown. He’ll turn up the heat, still, 8 fantasy points didn’t kill anyone. C-

Dustin Keller: 1 catch for 19 yards… ugh… F

Cardinals: Just 12 fantasy points, they allowed less than two touchdowns for the 2nd straight week, but just 2 sacks limited their fantasy potential. Still, not bad. B

Papa’S Week 1 Splinter-Butts (bench him, son)

Chris Perry: Perry actually had a pretty nice day considering. He played against the Titans, and the Benglas passing attack as sucked. He managed 64 rushing yards and a touchdown. I’ll say I was wrong here.

Steven Jackson: Jackson had 13 carries for 53 yards and 7 catches for 37 yards. No scores. 8 fantasy points in a non PPR – 15 in a PPR. Exactly what I expected, sit him if you had better options.

Chris Chambers: 13th overall in fantasy last week – tricked me good. This one was a failure.

Devery Henderson: 2 fantasy points – right on the number with this one.

theRUNDOWN: Week 2

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It’s Week 2, but don’t be caught up in the fantasy rush. This week there are some nice sleeper picks getting kicked off fantasy teams as we speak. We have two Monday Night games for the 2nd week in a row, and I can’t be more excited about the recent cast-offs littering my rosters. Here are my best, sneakiest, and worst plays of the week – enjoy!

QB: Peyton Manning vs. Minnesota: Ideally you want a quarterback to be very good, playing against a week secondary, but also going up against an offense that can put points on the board. Oh, and it doesn’t hurt that his rushing attack will likely struggle. This is the case in Minnesota this weekend – the Manning show will be in full effect.

RB: LaDainian Tomlinson vs. Denver: Thanks for this. Unlike the Raiders, the Chargers won’t abandon the run, and LT will put up ridiculous points against the Broncos.

RB: Adrian Peterson vs. Indianapolis: Think the Colts were worried about Kyle Orton last week? Nope. Did it stop rookie Matt Forte from running all over the Colts defense? Nope. Think AP will have a week to remember in his home opener this season? I sure do.

WR: Randy Moss vs. Jets: I think Randy steps up huge now that Tom’s out for the season – it all starts in this game where the Pats are an underdog – nobody on New York’s defense is stopping Randy, and Cassel, if he’s smart, will give him a few chances to make plays.

WR: Reggie Wayne vs. Minnesota: The Vikes will put up enough points to make Peyton throw it around. Wayne can torch the Vikes secondary. This should be a good play.

TE: Heath Miller vs. Cleveland: I know Jason Witten was wide open all day against the Browns- it could have been just the game, but I’m willing to bet Heath will find his spaces as well.

K: Rod Bironas vs. Cincinnati: I feel bad taking any kickers, but Rod looks like he should have a big day. I may have jinxed the guy, and he seems like a good fella, oh well – that’s my job, kicker icer.

D: Giants vs. St. Louis: Sacks and then interceptions – seems like a Giant recipe for success.

PAPA’S Week 1 SLEEPERS

JaMarcus Russell: 220+ and 2 scores… Doubt me? We’ll see who is right. I’d say Russell outscores Favre, Brees, or Carson Palmer.

Aaron Rodgers: You believe yet? Rodgers plays even better this week, keeps the high percentage but throws for more yards in a big Packers’ win.

Chris Johnson: Is he still a sleeper starter? He’s going to kill the Bengals.

Julius Jones: #1 and really the only option for Seattle’s rushing attack. They didn’t look great, but they get the 49ers in Week 2, I like that match-up for the former Giant.

Laurence Maroney: Laurence Maroney will be a nice play this week. He’s a good runner, but can’t seem to get his hands on more than 15 carries – this week he will and 100+ and a TD is what I see from him.

Antwaan Randel El: The Redskins may look out of sync, but Twaan looks like he belongs in this offense, like he was made for it I guess. Against a Saints defense that isn’t known for stopping much, I like him as a sleeper in Week 2.

Anthony Gonzalez: He’s the number three, but he’ll be going up against a safety duo in Minnesota that can’t keep up with him. If he’s open, Manning will find him. He will be open, so, you get it right?

Robert Meachem: The kid didn’t play last week, but if you need help, somebody probably dropped him and he’s on the free agent list right now. Pick him up and at least see what he does. I think he’ll do some nice things.

Dustin Keller: He’s a nice mis-match problem with New England’s secondary – seems like a nice sleeper to me if you are in a Todd Heap bind.

Cardinals: The Cards are better than advertised and they have Miami this week in Arizona. I like my chances with them as my defensive pick-up of the week. Houston against Baltimore also gets consideration.

Papa’S Week 1 Splinter-Butts (bench him, son)

Chris Perry: Another tough team for Perry – he has lots of tough match-ups to begin his starting career – this is one of them.

Steven Jackson: If you have a nice #3, don’t feel shamed to sit your 1st round pick – that’s why you drafted running backs high. Jackson won’t do much against the Giants defense.

Chris Chambers: Not this week for the former Dolphin, Champ has him on lockdown.

Devery Henderson: I know Colston is out, and Henderson looks like a nice option, but he won’t get as many looks as you think, and his 80 yard touchdown probably won’t come this week.