Uncle John's 2007 NFL Mock Draft

My Crazy Uncle John is back in the saddle again, plucking picks from his light deprived rear-end. I won’t take any responsibility for the old man’s actions or predictions, but God knows he’s been around long enough to see a draft or two… So, without further senile ado, here’s his 1st Round Mock Draft.

***March 23rd, 2007.
***February 15th, 2007

  1. Oakland Raiders: JaMarcus Russell
    Al likes to go long, surely Russell can fit his vertical dreams, regardless of if his O-line keeps him from being horizontal.
  2. Detroit Lions: Brady Quinn
    Lions don’t dare pass on a potential franchise quarterback with Jon “Short-term” Kitna running the show now.
  3. Cleveland Browns: Adrian Peterson
    Jamal Lewis might have a year at best, so Adrian should walk into a half-carry duty ready to take over in 2008, just like Joseph Addai and Laurence Maroney.
  4. Tampa Bay Buccaneers: Calvin Johnson
    With Calvins Terrell Owens skills and Isaac Bruce attitude, the “quarterback” in Tampa will love the best player in the draft.
  5. Arizona Cardinals: Joe Thomas
    Leondard Davis was the best of a bad bunch, and he’s gone, the Cards use JT to get the Edge jumpstarted.
  6. Washington Redskins: Gaines Adams
    The Redskins would be smart to stay put and take the best defensive lineman in the draft. Smart? Did I say Redskins and smart together? Yikes.
  7. Minnesota Vikings: LaRon Landry
    Darren Sharper and Dwight Smith aren’t getting any younger, so I expect the most explosive secondary option in the Draft to go here.
  8. Atlanta Falcons: Reggie Nelson
    Nelson would really make Atlanta’s secondary faster than any in the league, even with Landry gone, Nelson would team up great with the Falcons corners.
  9. Miami Dolphins: Levi Brown
    Miami’s abysmal line minus Damien McIntosh means Levi Brown wears a Dolphin Uni from here on out.
  10. Houston Texans: Ted Ginn Jr.
    Ted takes over for Moulds, finally giving Andre Johnson a speedy 2nd option, and giving Matt Schaub a shot at staying alive.
  11. San Francisco 49ers: Adam Carriker
    High energy, not stop motor, big asset to improve a young defense that Mike Nolan has been trying to improve since he arrived in the Bay.
  12. Buffalo Bills: Leon Hall
    Nate Clements gone, surely the Bills are happy to see the best corner in the draft at pick 12.
  13. St. Louis Rams: Alan Branch
    Michigan’s studs go back to back. Branch’s personality qualms only let his fantastic upside fall this far.
  14. Carolina Panthers: Patrick Willis
    Carolina needs linebackers like Brittany Spears needs a new pair of panties. Lucky for them Willis is the most dynamic of the bunch.
  15. Pittsburgh Steelers: Darrelle Revis
    Would have loved Willis here, but a pick late and a dollar short, the Steelers put their cards in Revis’ hands. Tomlin’s defensive background has the Steelers getting secondary help in a hurry.
  16. Green Bay Packers: Marshawn Lynch
    With Green gone, Brett will need Lynch’s tough running style in Green Bay.
  17. Jacksonville Jaguars: Robert Meacham
    The Jags need speed, and though Meacham is big like Williams and Jones, he can get deep for Byron.
  18. Cincinnati Bengals: Amobi Okoye
    Amobi Okoye.! Delighted that this high character young super star in the making fell to them, the Bengals take a step in the right direction.
  19. Tennessee Titans: Chris Houston
    Pacman will be out in the cold, and the Titans need help at corner anyway, Jones’ absence assures a corner going here.
  20. New York Giants: Paul Posluszny
    With Arrington, Emmons, and Short not working out, the Giants must get young and productive at linebacker right now, Paul gets that done.
  21. Denver Broncos: Jamaal Anderson
    The secondary is set in Denver, and the Cleveland Brown connection didn’t do the damage Shanny was hoping for, so Anderson goes now.
  22. Dallas Cowboys: Aaron Ross
    Dallas’ pass defense was inconsistent all year, and Aaron Ross is a native son who will do work.
  23. Kansas City Chiefs: Dwayne Bowe
    Kansas City set up some smoke screens about not “needing” a WR here, but lets be honest, Eddie Kennison and Jeff Webb think that’s messed up.
  24. New England Patriots (via Sea): Joe Staley
    With everything else seemingly taking place in New England, that leaves room for the Pats to go offensive line here, just like they always do.
  25. New York Jets: Jarvis Moss
    The Jets need a pass rusher, and Moss has all the ability to be at least a poor version of Javon Kearse. Hopefully a healthy version.
  26. Philadelphia Eagles: Brandon Meriweather
    With Michael Lewis out, and Brian Dawkins aging, the Eagles make a smart move here, weird. Brandon has all the athletic ability to be a star in the league for years to come.
  27. New Orleans Saints: Greg Olsen
    Eric Johnson never could stay healthy in San Francisco, and Olsen has all the speed and athletic ability to be the pass catching option at TE the Saints would love to have.
  28. New England Patriots: Jon Beason
    Teddy Bruschi is on the path to retirement, and Beason would be a great option to play for years along side Adalius Thomas.
  29. Baltimore Ravens: Dwayne Jarrett
    While Jarrett has fallen from the Top 10, and some even have him stumbling out of the First Round, I think Jarrett’s college career will at least get him to Baltimore in Round 1.
  30. San Diego Chargers: Anthony Gonzalez
    McCardell is gone, and Gonzalez is college’s version of Keenan. He always catches the ball, goes out in traffic to make plays, and has deceptive speed.
  31. Chicago Bears: Justin Blaylock
    This offensive guard will aid an aging offensive line, that needs to remain the Bears strength, especially with Jones gone to New York.
  32. Indianapolis Colts: Anthony Spencer
    With Corey Simon’s injuries and illness making him questionable, the Colts will take the best defensive lineman available, and that is Anthony Spencer.

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