theRUNDOWN: Week 5

QB: Drew Brees vs. Minnesota: He’ll have to throw at least as much as Kerry Collins did last week, but when Drew throws 35 times he completes at least 25 of those passes. Against Minnesota’s leaky secondary I like his chances for a big day.

RB: Marion Barber vs. Cincinnati: Is there a worse match-up for the Bengals? A really tough running back that refuses to go down against a defense that refuses to commit to tackling. Hmm….

RB: Matt Forte vs. Lions: Matt Millen just wanted to leave before a rookie put up 200 yards on his defense – I don’t blame him.

FLEX: Earnest Graham: I think Graham will go off against the most friend rush defense in the league. These guys in Denver are huggers for sure.

WR: Larry Fitzgerald vs. Buffalo: I know the Bills have been solid defensively, but with Boldin out I see a lot of targets for Larry, and I don’t think Buffalo can stop him even if they know it’s coming. They don’t have that kind of corner talent.

WR: Reggie Wayne vs. Houston: This is basically a free 7 catches for 100+ yards and a score -that’s how I see it.

TE: Jason Witten vs. Cincinnati: This guy is great. I’ll start him 16 times this year in my league I own him in, maybe even on his bye, who knows?

K: Rian Lindell vs. Ram-Rod: I’m sure I’ll look bad again here, but how can you not like the Bills kicker against this defense? (I know why, because I picked him to have a big day, that’s the best anti-pick you could have).

D: Chicago Bears vs. Detroit: Jon Kitna is a sitting turnover, and I don’t think Rudi Johnson will be going off for 80+ rushing yards this week – I’ll go with my Bears.

PAPA’S Week 1 SLEEPERS

Phillip Rivers: Shhh…. Phillip is slowly becoming a must start. Don’t look now but Rivers is second to only Brett Favre with 10 touchdowns on the season. Yes, Rivers has more touchdowns than everyone’s favorite Cutler.

Trent Edwards: Trent will be throwing a lot as Arizona’s front 7 is stout against the run. I also see Denver being down in this one and Arizona putting up enough points to put Buffalo is shootout mode. He coudl have his best passing day of his career – yards wise anyway.

Gus Frerotte: I’d start him this week – he’s a nice option against the Aint’s secondary.

Steve Slaton: Slaton has watched his stock rise way up the charts with his ability to do it on the ground and through the air. He might be the tool Houston needs to upset the Colts.

Jonathan Stewart: If I didn’t have a sure thing starting option this week, or if my guys Jamal Lewis or Steven Jackson were on bye, I’d feel good starting Jonathan Stewart -but when will the Panthers get him going in the receiving game? He’s got great hands.

Brandon Jackson: He’s a big chance, for sure, but the Packers might have to give him 14-16 carries right? With Grant struggling and Rodgers on the pine, I think Jackson is a big sleeper this week against the Falcons front 7.

Bernard Berrian: I like Berrian for a second straight week. He’ll be more consistent from here on out – he’s a nice player.

Jerry Porter: Porter should be back to full health, and the Jaguars seem to need him. He could be a nice start in his first game action with the Jags, especially against the Texans secondary.

Eddie Royal and DeSean Jackson: I’d keep playing these kids. I know that rookie receivers are supposed to struggle, but Royal has too much speed and quickness for the old man corners in Tampa Bay, and you know Denver will be throwing. DeSean is going up against an injury depleted secondary from Washington. Both are nice starts.

Kevin Boss: I think Boss is a good bye week, stop-gap player this week. Burress is supsended so he’ll get more targets. The Hawks defense is solid, but they still give up passing yards.

Carolina Panthers: The Chiefs don’t do work two weeks in a row do they? I’m thinking sacks and just a couple points allowed for a big Carolina day.

Papa’S Week 4 Splinter-Butts (bench him, son)

Jason Campbell: Despite his Top 10 start, I don’t like him in Philly this week. Even with the Eagles clogging up the ground game, I have a feeling Jason’s day will be mistake prone.

Julius Jones: He’s the Hawks #1 – 25 carry guy this week if the game’s close. But he won’t do a whole lot with all those touches. I’d just pretend he’s on bye again this week.

Clinton Portis: Portis got me last week with a nice performance against Dallas – not this week against an Eagle team that just lost. Philly plays the run better than anyone else right now.

Santana Moss: I don’t think he does it this week. I figure I have to start him in my leagues, but if he’s ready to have a bad game it’s this week against Philly – one thing on his side is the Redskins will have to throw the ball around a little.

Ten for Tuesday: Week 4

  1. Aint no business like upset business: Just when the NFL was getting nice and predictable, I get home from my city league flag football game and the Giants, Patriots, and Bills are all losing to the Bengals, Dolphins, and Raiders. The Dolphins are the only team that ended up winning, but boy o boy, this weekend has shown me that anything is possible in the NFL. That being said, I still like the Pats to play well, the Dolphins to win less than 6 games, and the Raiders to do the stupidest thing ever next time they lose by a big margin, fire the only sane guy making decisions in Oakland.
  2. On that note, Al Davis is a freak, idiot, moron, team killer, cheap, useless, wretch of a man that needs someone to fire his own ass. There it is, I said it. The guy is lost in his hair gel and I’m sick of his ridiculous antics. He wants to fire Lane Kiffin. Unfortunately for him, Lane is a good coach. Hmmm…. Tough deal for Al. So what will he do? I know, he’ll wait for the Raiders to play like crap and then try to fire him. And his stubborn ass will try not to pay Lane, too, like Kiffin’s cheap NFL coach salary is a tough hit for this dope. I officially hate the Raiders, and it’s all because of the moron calling the shots from his stupid box seats. Hate.
  3. Michael Turner is still a beast. He may have not gone off for 220 yards, but who cares right, The Burner busted off three touchdowns and is showing everyone why I “reached” for him in almost every league I play in. I just hope he can do work against decent defenses – we’ll see.
  4. Speaking of going off, how about this Ronnie Brown guy? Ronnie is way too talented to be a back-up for long, just ask that Dolphin staff. Last week the Fins had Ronnie basically run their offense – and he didn’t do too bad either. Brown accounted for 5 touchdowns, rushing in four times and tossing one just to even things out a bit. That’s not even the most impressive part, he did everything left handed – amazing. Ronnie showed last season that he can be a special player. His offensive line is better, and if he keeps getting 20 carries he’s a steal for all of those guys that just traded Antwaan Randel El to get him. (that’s me – and by the way, Ronnie is left handed)
  5. Lost in the mucky muck – if you waited this long to pick up Deion Branch and Bobby Engram it might be too late. However, there’s a chance that everyone is lost in the seasonal muck and Branch and Engram have slipped through some muddy fingers. If that’s the case you might want to turn in your “sleepers” and get some proven guys that are coming back to an offense that desperately needs them. Run!
  6. Thank Goodness for meaningless fantasy points: Brett Favre and Aaron Rodgers – who knew it would be these two former teammates cashing in for fantasy owners everywhere with nothing on the line. Rodgers turned some late game passing into 290 yards and a rushing touchdown for a pretty solid day, while Brett threw 2 of his 3 touchdowns in the 4th quarter of a game they had very little chance to succeed. Does that make a players numbers skewed? I don’t know – tough call. I know that a bunch of points is better than a little, no matter how you look at it. Bad fantasy teams can have good fantasy air attacks, that’s for sure, ask the Cardinals of yesteryear.
  7. Maurice Jones Drew is awesome. That’s right, if you’ve ever listened to an interview, watched him do all that he does during a game, paid any attention to this little mighty mouse whatsoever, you have to love the kid. The Jaguars were 0-2. They went to the film, went to their roster, and said, “We should probably get the best player on the field the ball a little more, it might open up some things for us.” Uh, yeah. Fred Taylor is legit, but Jones Drew’s effort and rushing style is infectious. All of a sudden the Jaguars believed in their chances and they got it done on the road in Indy. Lets hope, for JD’s sake and his owners’ fantasy hopes, that they don’t forget who gives them the best chance to get Ws.
  8. Carson Palmer is back? I don’t know for sure, but I’m going with yes. He sure looked loss over the past few weeks, counting the pre-season. But his confidence was back against a very good pass rush from New York. He didn’t get Ocho Cinco the ball very often, but he did throw some nice passes and seemed to have figured himself out a bit yesterday. Good stuff. I recently got a trade offer giving me Santana Moss and Palmer for Tony Romo. I turned it down, but I might be regretting that. I still think Romo is in line for one of the best fantasy seasons among all quarterbacks, but that combo might have been good for me. If you trust that Carson turned the corner, go for the gusto, if you are still weary, hold off on his value.
  9. Vikings/Titans = Frerote/Collins? Crazy. The Titans are 3-0 and Collins is doing enough to keep defenses at least a little bit honest. The Vikings won their first game this last week, and that was Frerote’s first game action this year. Do these guys really give their teams a better chance to win than Tarvaris Jackson and Vince Young? Right now it looks like yes is the answer. It should be interesting to see if either quarterback does well this coming Sunday. Neither defense allows much on the ground, so if the Titans or Vikes want to win, the pressure will be on the back-ups shoulders.
  10. Chris Collinsworth: Okay, I played Madden ’09. Why, of all freaking annoying terrible people would the Madden group put Chris Collinsworth’s stupid voice all over a pretty good game? I have to play the thing on mute – I’m dead serious. Chris has passed up even the horrendous Bill Walton as the worst announcer this side of that dumb broad that gabbed on and on during diving in the olympics. I don’t care if he was a receiver with some talent, he’s a brutal football announcer and I’d rather listen to crickets chirp.