Ten for Tuesday: Week 9 Fantasy Football Review

Unfortunately, this is the Wednesday version of 10 for Tuesday, this one took a back seat to some other articles I had to throw up for Tuesday’s publishing, but don’t you worry, like cheese and Barry Bonds, it only got better with time….

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6 to 7 coaches need to watch Peyton Manning and the Colts execute a game plan on any given week. Maybe then guys like John Fox, whomever is calling plays in Buffalo, Jack Del Rio, Tom Coughlin and company, and a couple other team decision makers can see what it’s like to stick to a plan. If anything, the Colts know who they are and they go after it. Watching Peyton break out into a no-huddle, so a linebacker would have to continue guarding Dallas Clark, was awesome. What a smart team….    The Giants use of Brandon Jacobs pissed me off more than anything else. How can you be at the end of a close game and looking at a box score that shows Jacobs has just 11 carries for 67 yards? Who is the tool shed that decided Jacobs’ 6 yards per carry were just too damn efficient to be used 15 more times? I just don’t get it…..   How about the Cowboys forcing the ball to Roy Williams all day in Philly? I wish that had backfired. That kind of middle school, make everybody happy by giving them the ball, get everyone in, type of crap, especially in the freaking NFL, is a joke. Fortunately, Miles Austin didn’t mind one bit and when the game was on the line, Austin did work and won the game for Dallas. It’s still clown work…..

Vince Young is a winner, sorry if you don’t like it. You have to give a guy his credit, and Vince, from the very start, came in and won football games. Sure, he’s had his troubles, he might not be the most mentally tough player in the league, and he might feel as entitled as a spoiled little rich kid, but when it comes to football, VY wins games. Even his accuracy has been solid. He’ll never blow you away with numbers, but he is a threat to run and teams have to be aware of that. That’s one more thing to think about, and so far, it’s one too many things for opponents to think about…. The Green Bay Packers offensive line is good at run-blocking. They are bad at pass blocking. Aaron Rodgers is an accurate missile thrower but he holds the ball too long. What does all that add up to? Run the damn ball. If the Packers ran to set up the pass, or at least ran the ball consistently early in games, Aaron would be able to use the play action pass to his advantage. He could hold the ball long and probably live a long productive life. The way it’s going now, he’s going to be in a cast or two watching Matt Flynn running the show….   That whole Chad Johnson business is ridiculous. That’s right, I’m just going to call him Chad Johnson like I’d call Drew Bledsoe, chump – because it makes me feel better than typing incorrect Spanish mashed together into one awkward name. He probably knew he’d get fined. He definitely didn’t think a dollar was getting him anywhere. He obviously was just having a good time with it. But this is the no fun league. What really gets my taco-loving-goat is that it’s his interview afterward, using the word “BRIBE” that is the main reason why he’s going to be disciplined. Holy shit. What the hell do you call what he was pretending to do? The fact that grown men can be so butt-tossed over the use of a no-no word sounds a little too much like “The Village” to me, or if you’re looking for a good move, “Harry Potter” will do. So if he had said, “I just wanted to hand the official a dollar to see what I could get for a dollar” he’d be okay? The fine would be cut in half? Dumb….

If Vernon Davis walked up to me and said “Click, Clack” I might pull out my wallet and “See what I could get for a dollar”. The guy is nasty. He takes hits like it’s his job to prove how much bigger and badder he is then the next guy. And you know what, that is his job. And you know what, he is probably bigger and badder than the next guy. It has been refreshing to see his transformation into a big time NFL player. People always gave him a really hard time, but the kid has always been super competitive and a very hard worker, he just needed a little help with directing his attitude. Done and done…. Mike Sellers was the Redskins leading receiver against the Falcons. You heard me. A team that has traded, drafted, and signed receiver after receiver went to Mike Sellers enough to make him the leading receiver. What else, Jason Cambell probably attempted one pass over fifteen yards. The kid has a big arm, they have a speed demon that is known for making big plays down-field in Santana Moss. They have Devin Thomas who is one big, fast, s.o.b. They have Malcom Kelly who can make some plays in single coverage. And Randle El has been known to make a thing or two happen down field. This team has no idea what they are….. I’m pretty sure JaMarcus Russell and Derek Anderson had a QB competition during the bye and Russell lost. Anderson’s reward? He doesn’t have to play in front of people anymore. JaMarcus Russell’s response, “I did pretty good, completed a couple passes, I really can’t ask for more than finishing second, second is pretty solid. You know, it’s hard when you have to look through a tunnel.” True…..  Cedric Benson, I’m sorry for anything bad I ever said about you. You win. Just before the season, some schmuck in my Dynasty Fantasy Football league traded Steve Slaton away to get Cedric Benson. That was it. Benson for Slaton. I was outraged. “How could you be so dumb?” I asked again and again. Well, I think Slaton is a stud, and I’m sorry that Gary Kubiak has gone all Mike “Splinter” Shanahan on the poor kid, but even if Slaton wasn’t being benched for the elite services of Ryan Moats and Chris Brown, I think I would take back the whole, “How stupid can you be?” question. The question I’m asking now is, “How did you know? And what else do you see in that crystal ball?”

Fantasy Football News: Ten for Tuesday

This is where Lucky Lester breaks down NFL news (usually from the week that was and usually 10 newsworthy happenings) and how it effects fantasy football owners going forward. Let the games begin… Now! We can’t wait until Thursday!

Matt Cassel was back at practice on Monday, going through all the drills and looking relatively healthy in doing so. If you’re starting the youngster, who is pitching pigskin for an offense that scored just two touchdowns this pre-season, on a team that is going up against the Baltimore Ravens in Baltimore – then you have more to worry about than Cassel’s kneesies…   LenDale White not only feels no regret from his terrible towel stomping escapades of yesteryear, he’d do it again, and he expects to. Luckily, we don’t have to wait too long for this to play out, as opening night sees Pittsburgh come to Tennessee for what promises to be a big one. On the matter of big and LenDale White, most would enter a fat joke here – but the young TD machine lost 20 pounds this off-season, and looks to have lost some of that baby fat that was holding his break-away speed back. He has looked better than Chris Johnson this pre-season – but that’s just the pre-season…   Speaking of the Titans, Kenny Britt might be a guy to stash away for this week’s game. He’s not owned in most leagues, but the kid is a beast, no doubt about that, and I’m pretty sure he’s starting. If he shows well against the Steelers, I don’t think he’ll go back to the back-up role, and at the very least you could have nice trade bait. If it doesn’t work out this Thursday, just drop him and pick up that other 16th guy on your roster instead…    This past weekend Tila Tequila (nice name for a tramp) called in a citizen’s arrest on Shawne Merriman for “choking her and holding her against her will”. Sounds bad, but the more I read the more I think this thing will blow-over, regardless of what actually happened. Now I’m almost always on the side of the accuser in these cases, usually to a fault, but this girl is a full blown gong show, and every poor ace-hole that accidentally ran across her stupid show, when they pushed the channel up button too fast, knows it. I’m not saying Shawne’s guilty or innocent, but he is guilty of dating one of the crazier funny-looking fake chicks in the universe. Miss Tequila had more than a couple Tequila shots prior to the incident and Merriman claims to have been “just keeping a friend safe…” All that being said, I would hate to be the Raiders’ offense this weekend. Shawne’s one bad-bad football man, and having charges brought against him by a crazy reality TV star probably won’t cool him off for Sunday’s action. I wouldn’t even want to practice against the guy this week… I’ve always been a huge fan of Sammie Stroughter since his early years at Oregon State. The former Beaver has gone through some tough times, and emerged as a stronger guy because of it. After getting picked late on day 2 of they ’09 NFl Draft, Stroughter has been strong in Bucs’ Camp, and has been recently named the #3 receiver in Tampa. Now I don’t think Tampa will throw much more than 45% of their offensive snaps, but for those deep dynasty league owners, this kid is legit…   Matthew Stafford was named the starting quarterback, but I wouldn’t be stunned at all if Culpepper got the job back a few games into the season. Stafford has a strong arm, no doubt, and his touch isn’t bad, but I watch him play and I don’t think he’s ready. I’ll admit that he has a bright future, but after a couple weeks of struggling, and a couple weeks for Culpepper to be completely healthy, I think the job goes back to the ex-Viking…   That being said, Brandon Petitgrew was also named the starter for the Lions, and he’ll be a solid option regardless of who stays at QB. BP came in with Stafford this year, and I’m sure their relationship is strong because of it. Pep loves throwing to TEs, and you know defenses will be most focused on Calvin Johnson and then Kevin Smith. As a 3rd option for a team that expects to be playing from behind, I like Petitgrew’s upside…   Tim Hightower was named the starting RB in Arizona, and I don’t think that’s just a one-week gig. Many people will say that the Cardinals didn’t waste a 1st rounder on a RB to see him be a back-up, but that’s actually happened a lot. It’s not so long ago that the Cardinals were high on Hightower, and the guy put in work this off-season and looks faster and smarter with his cuts this pre-season. Beanie Wells will get touches, but he didn’t get drafted to take the starting job, he got drafted because he was the most talented player left on the board. No promises were given…. Eric Mangini is up to his old wiley ex-Patriot tricks again, not naming a starter to the public. Who cares, first of all – you shouldn’t. If you do, it must be because you are a Browns fan, or stuck with one of these guys as a back-up, and in that case you had to see some pre-season action, look at the way the team has reacted, the way the ball was moved with one guy or another, it’s pretty damn clear to me that Quinn is the guy in Cleveland….   Pierre Thomas didn’t practice Monday, and that means those that got Reggie Bush late have a very talented starting running back, that was amongst the league leaders before going down with an injury last season, going up against the vaunted Lions defense in Week 1. It has baffled me all summer/fall to see Bush going so late, especially in PPR leagues. Is he a chance? Sure, but a chance well worth taking. It seems his hype became too much to handle and the guy turned into fantasy owner poison. Put that on pizza and beer and your bound to cause a mass epidemic aimed toward fat guys 10x as deadly as swine flu.

Football this Thursday! See you next Tuesday!!