2005 Week 12 NFL Pick Review

Ding, Ding, Ding, Ding! 12-4
Pocket Aces, Ace on the Flop, Ace on the River

Winners
Atlanta (-3) at Detroit -What do you know? Atlanta halted the Lion’s pathetic rushing attack, and they won another game. If the Falcons can shut down your runner they will win. Vick played solid football, but it was the rushing duet of Warrick Dunn and TJ Duckett that carried the rock to victory. To top it all off, Steve Marioochi was fired on Monday. Nice.

Denver (-2.5) at Dallas – Denver took me to a perfect Thanksgiving, which is ironic because my Holiday weekend was anything but perfect. My turkey fell victim to Thanks Giving football, spending an hour too long in the oven, which made everything taste like burning. Besides my kids fighting each other and crunching up their faces with every bite, my wife couldn’t stop making fun of how bad my picks have been of late and how she’s number one in her office pool (where spreads don’t matter, mind you). Needless to say I took Friday off to go hang out in the Stripper bus.

Baltimore at Cincinnati (-9.5) -Cincinnati started to dominate just as I had imagined, then Baltimore started scoring. I was worried for about a minute. The Bengals continued their offensive onslaught, and at the end of the game, it was my third win of the week.

Cleveland at Minnesota (-4) – The Vikings came out victorious in the end. How have the done it? I’m seriously asking. If anyone can tell me how a trade of Daunte Culpepper for Brad Johnson will improve a football team, I would love an email. I took the new found Vikes in this one, and I got paid. Mike Tice won’t get paid. Mark my words.

New England at Kansas City (-3) – The Chiefs needed this game much more than the Patriots and they showed it on the field. Tom Brady was intercepted 4 times by the new Chief defense. Three of those pics came by way of David Wesley. Nicknamed “OC” because he plays out of control, Wesley single handily made sure Brady had his worst day as a pro. This big time play could catapult the Chiefs into the playoffs.

San Diego (-3) at Washington – Ladainian Tomlinson. After the running back’s performance on Sunday, he’s got me wondering if he’s the best ever. I can sure understand why his coach would think that. In a day where kickers played like garbage, Ladainian made sure there was never a kicker needed to win the game. A stiff-arm followed by a sprint took the Chargers to victory. A touchdown covered for me also. LT for President!

San Francisco at Tennessee (-7) – What can I say? “San Francisco is starting Ken Dorsey at quarterback for the second straight week. Look for Brown to have a huge day on the ground.” (Me) Chris Brown had another huge day and Ken Dorsey was the starter for the Niners. Those are two things that just don’t equal out ot be a 49er victory.

St. Louis (-3.5) at Houston -“The Rams played like a pile of rabbit droppings last week.” (me) and they did the same thing this week. Luckily for their lucky asses, they pulled a rabbit family out of their caucux. When the game was 24-3, I told my Uncle John to “Watch out for these Rams, they’re the luckiest bastards on earth.” He told me they weren’t that lucky being down 3 touchdowns. Needless to say, he agrees with me now. After watching the Rams score and score and get an onside kick and score, then score in overtime to win it, Uncle John hates the lucky Rams as much as I do. Fortunately, for the second straight overtime game a touchdown gave me victory where a field goal wouldn’t have. Sweet Carl!

Jacksonville (-3.5) at Arizona – Byron Leftwich broke his ankle and the Cardinals still couldn’t muster up enough salsa to take down the Jaguars in Arizona. If the Cardinals aren’t the biggest disappointment this year I don’t know who is. Wait, yes I do, the New York Jets.

Green Bay at Philadelphia (-2) – The Packers just can’t win football games. The Eagles didn’t do anything particularly well, but Brett Favre evened out his touchdowns and interceptions on the year, and the Eagles took advantage. The 5 point victory in Philly gave me another win for my bank roll.

New Orleans (+3) at N.Y. Jets – “The Saints are out of any playoff or season saving chances, so theyƕre ready to start playing well. As it always is. Money in the bank!” (Me) Oh the Jets. Hopefully they’ll get a player in the draft that will turn things around for one of the most unlucky coaches in the game, Herman Edwards. If anyone knows the Saints, I do. They’re out of any race besides the race to move down in the draft. What does that translate to? Saint victories!

Pittsburgh @ Indianapolis (-6) – The Colts played well enough to win this game, but it was the Steelers who gave victory to Indy. An onside kick to start the half? C’mon Bill Cowher… Don’t piss away your chances like that. I would have liked to see Pittsburgh pull it off, but no one will beat the Colts playing like that. Big Ben was still a week away from being completely healthy with his timing back, and the rushing attack couldn’t penetrate the Colts ferocious defense. Those are three words I never thought I’d put together.

Losers

Carolina (-4.5) at Buffalo – Carolina came out with the victory, but winning by 4 points on a 4.5 spread game doesn’t work out that often. The Bills shut down the Panther rushing attack, even with Deshaun Foster getting the starting nod. Delhomme wasn’t on fire, and so the Panthers only scored 13 points. Luckily, they were playing a team led by JP Losman. What does that mean? Three field goals and they’re out. Won’t cut it.

Chicago at Tampa Bay (-3) – Cadillac Williams had 84 rushing yards on 19 carries, but it wasn’t enough to dismantle the Bear train. Chicago’s defense is ridiculously good, bringing comparisons to the great ’85 Bear defense. That’s a good comparison. Both are completely dominate up front with a stud in the middle. The Bears had an offense, so this year’s D might be better?

Miami at Oakland (-7) – Miami just lost their chances of taking home Matt Leinart or Vince Young. I guess they’ll have to settle for Marcus Vick. Miami upset the Raiders, though was this really an upset? With the Dolphins bring it to your face pass rush attack, wasn’t it assumed that Kerry Collins would have trouble getting the ball off because he has the slowest release in football? Ken Dorsey and Cody Pickett let go of the football faster than Collins. Oakland lost again and super star receiver Randy Moss had 3 catches for 28 frocking yards.

N.Y. Giants at Seattle (-5) – My last loss of the day came on a Seattle victory. Unlike the Rams and the Chargers, the Hawks didn’t score a touchdown in overtime that would have given me victory. Two out of three ain’t bad. What did happen in this game was, crappy calls against the Hawks and then an obvious showing of destiny as Jay Feely missed three makable kicks that would have given the Giants victory. Obviously the Hawks were meant to win, and if it weren’t for two suspect calls, they wouldn’t have needed 3 missed kicks in a row. But, they got them. Thanks Jay, God, and whomever else took the Hawks to 9-2.
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Lucky Lester – Free Football Picks